Creep

I'd like to tell you about my awesome opera trip to Seattle last week. I'm not quite as excited to write about my return to work now that the school year is starting, although that's the big news around here this week so I could be writing about that.

Instead, I'm writing because I just had a freaky experience and I feel the need to share it. I took the dog on a walk just now, and as I was walking through my apartment complex parking lot on my way home I noticed a white, windowless van sitting in the driveway preparing to turn out of the complex (yes, the cliche white van!). I noticed the van because the car waiting behind it eventually pulled up and went around it to get out of the lot since the van wasn't moving. That's when I realized the man in the van was watching me. At that point I had to pass beside the van to get to my apartment. It was either that or abrubtly double back the way I'd come and go around the back side of my building, but there's no entrance on the back side so I was screwed, basically. Anyway, I was already creeped out enough that I stayed many yards away from the door of the van as I passed by, and I wrapped my hound dog's leash tightly around my wrist several times, trying to silently communicate to the (probably useless in dangerous situations) dog that I might need him to protect me. In other words, I was getting a very, very bad vibe from the situation even before the man spoke to me.

And then he rolled down his car window and said, "Can I ask you a question?" I pretended I didn't hear him and kept walking and then he called after me, "I just want to talk to you." I said, "Sorry, I have to get the dog inside. He's overheated," (which was true, actually) and the guy said, "I just want to ask you one thing." I was really freaked out by that point because this clearly wasn't just an attempt to get directions. So I said, "What?" and kept walking and he said, "Can we be friends?" and I didn't answer and then he put the van in reverse and started following me up the hill. What the fuck?! I continued to ignore him, picking up the pace of my walk and thinking, "WhatdoIdo,whatdoIdo,whatdoIdo?" It was bright, sunny noon, but there were no other people around but me, the guy in the van, and a few cars driving by on the road that likely wouldn't have noticed if something happened. Then he shouted again, "I just want to be friends!" and I said, "I don't know you, sorry!" and he said, "Do you live around here?" and I didn't answer but at that point he was still following me up the hill. I knew I couldn't go into my own building because I don't want him to know where I live, but it felt too unsafe to just continue walking through the parking lot with him following me in the van. I briefly considered running for the pool, but the pool doesn't open until 2 so I knew no one would be there yet, and past the pool is just a few more apartment complexes and then a dead end very, very far from the main road.

So I did the only thing I could think to do: I walked briskly up the stairs into the building next door to mine. The two buildings are connected by an underground tunnel that runs between the basements. The tunnel and basements contain the storage units for each apartment and a shared laundry room. All I could think was THANK GOD Penn had discovered the connecting tunnel just a couple of months ago. I never knew I'd have to use it to escape from a creepy stranger in a white van, but I'm glad I knew about it. I ran downstairs to the basement as fast as I could. The door to the storage units/laundry room has a keypad on it so I typed in the code, ran inside, and slammed the door, hoping the guy wasn't following me. Then I ran through the tunnel to my apartment building and into the laundry room. One of my neighbors was down there doing laundry and I'm sure she was wondering why the hell her sweaty neighbor and a panting hound were bursting through the passageway from the building next door, but whatever. I ran all the way upstairs to my apartment and locked myself in and now here I am.

To add to the creepiness, I just remembered that yesterday when I was waiting for my bus to campus a man in a white van drove by and honked and waved at me. To be honest, the honking/waving/catcalling men in cars routine is not unusual. It happens at least once or twice every time I bike or walk the dog or stand at the bus stop. It's just something that happens to women who have the audacity to venture out in public solo (well, it happens to me, anyway, so I assume it happens to other women). I wasn't concerned about the guy in the white van yesterday, but now I'm paranoid that it's the same guy that creeped me out today, which means he lives in the neighborhood, likely even in this complex. Actually, that's a better thought than the alternative, which is that he doesn't even live here at all and is just stalking me. Ugh.

What should I do now? Anything? Maybe I'm being overly paranoid. Lord knows I am capable of making mountains out of molehills when it comes to finding things to worry about. [Case in point: I worked myself into tears the other night thinking that Penn had had a car wreck when he was twenty minutes late to pick me up at the airport. Turns out he was outside the airport all along, our phones just weren't connecting to each other for some reason so we both kept trying to call each other and failing.] Honestly, though, I did not get good vibes from the guy and I don't think it's innocent and normal to roll down your van window and ask a woman you've never met to be your friend. Should I get Penn to walk around the apartment complex with me later to try to find the van and write down its license plate number? The van is white with no windows and nothing written on it. The guy is thin, youngish (I'd guess mid-thirties or younger), black, no facial hair, from his accent I'd guess he's probably African (which makes me hopeful that there's a language and culture barrier and maybe he really does just want to be friends; he could just be confused about social norms and not malicious. Not that that's going to make me give the guy an actual chance at friendship if I see him again, because what if I try to be polite and it turns out I'm wrong?). Do you think I'm overreacting? Do I need to have my pepper spray handy when I stand at the bus stop now? Why does being a woman suck so much sometimes?